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All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
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If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
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Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
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Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.
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Once you\'ve written TBicycle, you never forget how.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
Whether you think that you can, or that you can\'t, you are usually right.
Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
The perfect computer has been developed. You just feed in your problems and they never come out again.
Don\'t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.
If you are going through hell, keep going.
Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
I never forget a face, but in your case I\'ll be glad to make an exception.
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
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I\'ve never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I\'ve seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
Build a man a fire, and he\'ll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he\'ll be warm for the rest of his life.
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
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I\'m desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
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Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax -- tomorrow you\'ll be afraid to cough.
All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
Multitasking /adj./ 3 PCs and a chair with wheels?!
If you haven\'t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
Is your argument that the Creator of the Universe was working under a deadline and His manager forced Him to rush inefficient designs into production?
To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.
Love is the answer - but while you\'re waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
I\'m not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It\'s just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.
So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me
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The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.
The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
You\'re about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.
When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse\'s family too.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?
No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
If it wasn\'t for C, we\'d be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.
We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.
In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn\'t speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.
I Can\'t Think Of Anything Reasonable To Counter Your Argument Or Don\'t Have The Least Inkling Of The Subject So I Will Resort To Name Calling And Hope I Can Get Away With It.
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
Why don\'t you write books people can read?
My last cow just died, so I won\'t need your bull anymore.
A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.
When I die I\'m going to leave my body to science fiction.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:27
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